I can't sleep this evening. I feel like my mind is racing a million miles minute. What got me started on this tonight? Well, let me just tell you:
The darn PARADE OF HOMES.
Nate and I bought some tickets today and ventured out to see a few of the homes. It is overwhelming and RIDICULOUS the way that some people live. Seriously....one house had a PIRATE SHIP in it with ropes to climb and a slide to go down. This same house had a secret passageway with a safe in it AND an ice drawer that makes ice like you get over at SONIC. (My favorite type of ice I might add.) Throw in a huge tv that comes out of the kitchen counter and a huge brick oven (with a tv above it) out on your ginormous deck and you've just barely scratched the surface.
It isn't necessarily these beautiful and completely over the top houses that are causing my mind to race. You see, the time has come to START the process of finding another home to buy for our family. When we lived in Boise and bought our first house there I feel we were a bit naive. Our boys were just tiny and we just felt good about our decisions concerning where would build a home. We thought we'd be there for a few years, sell after 5 years or so, make some money off of that first house (hahaha) and move to a more permanent place in Boise where we could raise our growing family. Then everything in Boise fell apart. You know the story.
Yeah, that's me...a blubbering mess back when that was all happening. I kept telling myself I was strong but really I was a complete and utter wreck. (Dallin took this picture of me in the middle of one my millions of break downs)
And we said good-bye.
Once again, things happen for a reason. It was obvious that we were meant to be over here. We have seen and continue to see the many reasons we are here. Things have fallen into place and we have a deeper understanding of trial and faith. Idaho Falls is home to us now. We were lead here, and we acknowledge that wholeheartedly.
Which brings us to today. Buying a house in Idaho Falls is a pretty HUGE deal to me. We're REALLY going to be putting roots down here. We're REALLY not going to raise our kids living by extended family...no cousins, no grandparents. We're not going back to Boise. We're REALLY here for the long haul. This is serious. This is commitment. This is so real.
The decision as to WHERE we buy in this city really stresses me out. I now realize that the decisions we make today will truly influence our children. Friends, neighbors, schools (high schools), a good ward...I just really want to make the BEST decisions that we possibly can. I don't want to uproot my kids again. I don't want to have to start over again. We've met a few amazing people where we live now. I've met a couple of lifelong friends. Friends who made my life bearable those first few months I came here kicking and screaming. The boys have some great friends in the neighborhood. The problem is, I just know in my heart that we don't belong here (in this particular neighborhood) long term.
No, it's not like we're moving this month or even this year. But, it's time to start asking the questions: Big yard/smaller yard? New house/older house? Neighborhood/open space? Close to town/further away? Build home/find existing home? Pirate ship/no pirate ship...haha just kidding!
It's exciting but I'm also terrified out of my mind. I know I feel this way becuase of where we've been and especially because of how burned we ended up after our last home buying experience. All I know is that we will take our time and make sure we are prayerful about whatever we need to do and where we need to be.
Ok, now that I have spent an hour rambling on and on I am TIRED and ready for BED!